On the beach I stood at dusk, washing away all that was to welcome in and embrace all that could be this year…”
January was relatively kind this year… Unlike previous years, where I have arrived much in a whirlwind and carrying the chaos of the year before, I found myself easing into the new year with gentleness and a refreshed (read rested) outlook of what lay ahead. It saw me venture away from home more than anticipated with an unplanned road trip to Victoria that soon became a blessing as I lost myself on the road somewhere between Canberra and Ballarat.
As each mile ticked over, so too did the abundance of scattered thoughts sailing through my mind, until one by one the unnecessary ones were left by the roadside, much like the rest stops dotted along the highway. Road trips have always held this magic about them; a healing energy that unwinds the mind, relaxes the body and is, in many ways, medicine for the soul. It’s refreshing, liberating and invigorating. Even more so when you find yourself with the freedom to pull over for the sole purpose of watching the first full moon of 2018 rise up over the horizon — releasing all that happened along with any hindering thoughts from 2017, the “failings” and the list of To Dos that you never finished.
Emerging the other side refreshed and ready to take on the new year, it inspired me to make more time for family and deepen the connections between myself, B and our little man.
And so it became my motivation for January. Between the 5th and 16th, I purged. Shredding unnecessary papers in my office, rearranging furniture and decluttering my digital footprint. Relinquishing connections, recycling mismatched stationery and smudging all that I could to cleanse the energy and make way for new intentions. The week following the Full Moon in Cancer (my ruling Sun Sign planet), I did the most liberating (and taboo) thing yet. I unfriended almost 50% of my social media network! But not before I posted this:
For me, I couldn’t just up and leave. I wanted others to understand where I was coming from and encourage those purged connections that it was okay. That our friendship on Facebook wasn’t necessarily a reflection of our relationship in real life. Although for some it may have been.
Not long after I posted the above, the final number of connections hit me. 180 connections gone. Just like that. And it felt great. There was no “hate mail” or petty whines. No text messages of disbelief. Just pure acceptance, and a newfound appreciation for being open and speaking my truth. It was about letting go of “endings” to make way for new beginnings.
It’s also how I came to find myself on Bondi Beach at dusk another week later, washing away all that was and ready to embrace all that is about to be.
I’m a believer in that you can’t move forward without truly understanding where you have been and where you intend to go. Nor can you accept new opportunities, friendship or energies until you shake the ones that no longer serve you. It’s therapeutic. It’s healing. And it quite often rejuvenates a sense of self-confidence and self-love. Throughout my previous life as an editor and when I entered my new life as a mum and soulopreneur, I attracted a collection of connections that fell in the “professional network” bucket, more than they did “meaningful”.
Up until now, I felt afraid to remove them in case they took it the wrong way. In case they thought less of me. In case I hurt their feelings. But really, if I’m to be honest…I was only hurting my own wellbeing and losing a sense of self. Everything in the universe vibrates its own energy. And like vibrations are drawn to each other. My networks were too corporate, too “keeping up with the Jones'” and less me. I needed to find my tribe again and for that, I need to make room.
So I embraced the change in “status” and now I’m dancing with it… and I’m encouraging you to do the same. It’s ok. I’ve got you.
I have faith. Because if you can’t trust in the timing of life, then you’re in for a very bumpy ride.